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Not too goddamned long. Somewhere between one and five minutes. The second time, approximately double that, and by the third or so I got it under control. My first time was pretty good time-wise, heck, it was pretty good, period. I came twice, once after 10 minutes, the second time after another 10 probably a 5 minutes break in-between.

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Across the table from me was a South Korean guy who had watched videos of me eating KFC during his time serving for his home country's national military. He had told me that watching my videos made him happy and miss America. Now we were on a first date because I am a crazy narcissist. I asked him careful questions about his years in the service and his home country. He gave me polite answers and told me, a white boy from New York, that I should really make it over to Asia at some point.

I downloaded Grindr as soon as my first iPhone was out of its box. Being able to use the gay dating and hook-up app, which paved the way for the likes of Tinder and Bumble , was one of my main motivations for getting my first smartphone when I was This probably sounds incredibly sad, but growing up in a place without a thriving gay scene made me desperate to find others who were like me. Although I did have some pleasant exchanges with other gay men, I was surprised by the coldness of most interactions.